octopus

i saw a necklace at store around town.

i liked it so much that i took it out of the glass case and tried it on. It's fake bronze and the pendant is an octopus about half the size of the palm of my hand. When it hangs on my neck, it hangs over my heart. I relate to it. i feel that its heaviness is appropriate for how i feel and for the octopus in the marine life sense...

it's my honorary power animal right now, my totem, my medallion: unfurling and mystical, reaching back and creating.

i paused to read up on its meaning. sailors use it to ward off evil. magical. creation, expansion, and an agent for growth.

more on this soon. will think about this more.

if __________

i imagine a rapid peeling of all the layers of my self

to expose fireworks and light, dancing around my insides.

i bet my face would make the happiest expression of satisfied faith.

tears could fall.

i would wrap my arms around ya and imagine a zip line from my mouth to yours,

a bouncy and speedy connect to safety.

my heart would jump so high out of my chest that when it landed i'd fall for you...again, you bastard.